How the Slut Was
Born
Recently a letter appeared in ADWOFF's mailbox.
It expressed concern with ADWOFF referring to Pat
Gaffney as The Lying Slut---that it might hurt her
professionally, etc., etc., etc.
In Beth Harbison's latest book, Wife Without
a Past, she wrote in her dedication: To the
Witches: Chris, Elaine, Mary, Mary Kay, Nora and
Pat.
I am sure that Beth meant no harm in calling her
sister and her pals, Witches ... it's just
an extension of the wicked humor and affection that
these ladies obviously have for one another.
It is the one thing that we have found that we
can emulate quite well! <ewg>
All kidding aside, my cyber-friendship with Pat
began back in May with the first publication of
ADWOFF. Nora wanted me to send a copy of ADWOFF to
Pat ... which then had me come up with the great
brainstorm of having Pat write a column for ADWOFF
#2. I have since had the pleasure of meeting Pat
twice in person ... and talking to her via e-mails
regularly.
In fact, here is one of her responses to me soon
after ADWOFF #4 hit cyberspace:
I was going to post you today
anyway, to tell you how deeply honored I am to be
immortalized on the 'Net as Our Favorite Slut.
Truly, the Rita, the Golden Leaf--none of these
awards means anything to me compared to the OFS
Award. I'd like to thank God, my agent, and my
parents, who never stopped believing in me. Thank
you. Thank you. You like me, you really like me!
Profoundly moved,
Pat
We use The Lying Slut nickname with a great deal
of affection for Pat. She is a wonderful lady and a
terrific writer (check out excerpts of her stories
@
http://www.patriciagaffney.com)
...
Soooooooooooo, because this BB/N would never
intentionally hurt her pal, Pat, she went directly
to the sources---Nora (because it was she who
STARTED calling Gaff THE LYING SLUT first!) and The
Lying Slut herself. <ewg>
Here is what they said ...
Nora: I know both Pat and myself
understand that you--and everyone else
involved--use the term with . . . affection. LOL.
But since the name's stuck to Pat--one I feel suits
admirably btw--this is one for her.
Pat: What do you think? Now, me, I LIKE "Lying
Slut." It's funny, for Pete's sake. Does it make
you uncomfortable, Sue? You, Nora? It doesn't make
this Lying Slut the least bit uncomfortable, for
what that's worth.
Sue: Well, I don't know. I don't know if I like
be associated with a known liar. <ewg>
I was going to leave it at this ... but then, I
decided to ask Nora and The Lying Slut some
clarifying questions ... their responses are very,
very interesting!
Here are the questions that I asked ...
Quick questions for you. I'm working on
explaining The Lying Slut for ADWOFF <ewg>
... and I have two questions ... okay, THREE! LOL!
- Nora, why/when did you start calling Pat ---
The Lying Slut?
- Pat, how did you feel the first time you
were called The Lying Slut?
- Pat, what does your mom think of you being
called a Lying Slut? (yikes, I hope your mom is
still alive)
- Pat, what nickname do you have for Nora?
(just curious, that's all! <ewg>)
(okay, I lied! I have FOUR questions!)
Needless to say, their responses were very
interesting! Be prepared for some ROTF LYAO PIYP
moments if you continue to read! <g>
Pat answered first ...
2. Pat, how did you feel the first
time you were called The Lying Slut?
How did I feel the first time I was
called The Lying Slut? Shocked!
Appalled! But--strangely--not surprised. I mean,
considering the source.
And also...a tiny bit sad, you know, to see what
an icon had been reduced to.
3. Pat, what does your mom think of you being
called a Lying Slut? (yikes, I hope your mom is
still alive)
I've kept my sainted mother shielded
from this indignity. Her heart, you know...
4. Pat, what nickname do you have for Nora?
(just curious, that's all! <ewg>)
My nickname for Nora? Wait--isn't
this a family newsletter? Oh, just kidding. I call
Nora what everyone calls her--she insists on it.
"Your Highness." Hahahahahahahaha!
Then Nora replied ...
1. Nora, why/when did you start
calling Pat --- The Lying Slut?
Because she is a lying slut.
Pat, you didn't tell Joem (her mom, Sue) that I
called you a lying slut, did you? Come on, don't
tell her. She loves me. She might not like it. Gee
whiz, Pat. If you do, I'll just tell her you're a
lying slut and that I never said it. She'll believe
me. She thinks I'm wonderful. So there.
Do you think it ends there? Ha! You don't know
these two! LOL!
Pat responded to Nora ...
Pardon me, a tiny
addendum seems to be in order here, Sue.
>
>1. Because she is a lying slut.
>
Ah, no. Actually what happened was, in a
previous ADWOFF edition, I happened to
mention--merely in passing, never DREAMING of the
consequences--that Nora is, in fact, a tiny bit
older than I am. Well! "Lying Slut" was the least
of it! Delicacy forbids me to repeat any of the
other vicious epithets hurled at my innocent head.
Well, it certainly taught me a lesson, and I'll
pass it along to you now: Never cross Her Highness.
To which Nora replied ...
In a message
dated 97-11-24 18:33:39 EST, pgaffney@cvn.net
writes:
<< Pardon me, a tiny addendum seems to be
in order here, Sue.
>1. Because she is a lying slut. <
Ah, no. Actually what happened was, in a
previous ADWOFF edition, I happened to
mention--merely in passing, never DREAMING of the
consequences--that Nora is, in fact, a tiny bit
older than I am. Well! "Lying Slut" was the least
of it! Delicacy forbids me to repeat any of the
other vicious epithets hurled at my innocent head.
Well, it certainly taught me a lesson, and I'll
pass it along to you now: Never cross Her Highness.
Pat >>
See! See! She is a lying slut. A pathological
lying slut. What can I do, I still love her. Help
me.
And Pat's response?
>See!
See! She is a lying slut. A pathological lying
slut. What can I do, I still love her. Help me.<
A 12-step program, perhaps?
And on it goes <g> ...
I have said it before ... I'll say it again. I
like these two ladies. <g> I'd never do
anything to hurt them --- intentionally or
otherwise. When Nora jokingly called Pat "The Lying
Slut" --- we picked up on it and used it simply
because these two don't put on airs ... they are
just like you and me. They love to tease one
another and be teased. They have wicked senses of
humor. They are awfully fun to talk to and to hang
around with. And yeah, I'd like to think of them as
friends.
I hope that this helps to explain The Lying Slut
moniker we've lovingly attached to Gaff. If it
makes you a little uncomfortable, just mentally
substitute your favorite slam that you like to call
your best buddies (you know, YOU BITCH! LOLOL) ...
that's all The Lying Slut is. <g> Well, at
least I think it is! <ewg>
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